So, this post is 100% anxiety provoked. I am super anxious today because of something I did last night. I’m sure some of you can relate. You know that feeling when you accidentally send a text to someone that you didn’t mean to and you get that instant sick, panicky, omg, I want to die right now, feeling? Well, I’ve been feeling that since last night.
So, I’m sure most of you read my post titled “The Emotional Texter” in which I admitted to being an emotional texter and vowed to not text but call when I have something important to say to someone (and I fully intend to do that); however, there are times when I can’t just call and tell someone something because I’m too apprehensive, so a text is really the only way.
Sometimes, I get super anxious when I have something that I want to say to someone and it causes me to hesitate. It’s the fear of rejection and/or ridicule. I was never like this before doing the shows. Anyway, sometimes it’ll take me a month or longer to be brave enough to say something that I need to say to someone, so I’ve gotten used to writing out what I would like to say (in the notes app) on my phone. I’ll just leave it there and sit with it until I get brave enough to actually send it.
Last night, I wanted to say something to someone so I opened up my notes and wrote out what I wanted to say. I felt comfortable with it and thought to myself “eff it, I’m going to be brave and just send it” so, I hit good old copy and paste, put it in a text and sent away. Felt brave enough to not even proof read it before hitting send. GO ME, right?!? WRONG. SO, SO WRONG.
I didn’t realize that I was writing in a “note” that I had already written in. (Insert huge FML here). Soooooo, this poor person, got both.
I want to die! I immediately sent the “omg that wasn’t for you” text and the “omg, I’m literally dying” text and then the 3rd, obligatory, long message trying to explain that ended up making zero sense and made me sound crazier than if I had just left it alone.
FUCK. Anxiety is the worst. So, yeah; this is what I’m dealing with right now and it’s not fun at all. AT ALL. Hope your weekend is going better than mine at this point. 🤦🏼♀️🙄🤦🏼♀️🙄🤦🏼♀️