DTR

Hey guys!!!

Sorry for the lack of blog posts. I have been dealing with some, not so fun medical issues and I also just got back from a trip to New York (which was much needed). But, now that I am back, I will be posting more regularly.

So, an update on the podcast if you have been following our progression. We are very close to releasing our first three episodes. We have been working very hard and being the OCD person that I am, I am not willing to release anything prematurely. But, it’s happening. Stay tuned. #stuckinthemiddle.

Speaking of the podcast, we just finished writing content for our newest episode and it is all about relationships. It’s honest, it’s real and it’s funny (no need to worry, ex’s, we don’t mention names). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll love us. You won’t want to miss it.

It’s so interesting the vast difference between relationships now vs back when our parents met and even when some of our friends met (depending on how old you are). Now a days, we have so much at our finger tips. Tinder, bumble, hinge, match, eharmony, etc, etc, etc….. the list of dating apps out there, seems endless. There are a plethora of “options” readily available to us. However, it seems that this is where we fail and why we are more lonely than ever before. Many of you who read this blog, know me and know my friends, but most of you don’t. Let me tell you a little bit about my friends. THEY ARE ALL MARRIED (well, most of them) and believe it or not, HAPPILY married! I know, right?!? it’s hard to believe, but it’s a thing, I promise.

While doing research for this podcast episode, I asked several of my married friends what they feel the difference is now versus when they met their spouses. Their answers were all basically the same. That now, with all of the dating apps and options available, everyone is afraid to commit because they fear there could be something better around the corner (with just a simple swipe). I then asked them to explain how dating was for them, i.e. what led to them meeting their now significant others. This is what they said dating was like:

They met someone, they dated for a while (putting as much effort and attention into that person as they could) and NOT looking for someone else simultaneously. If it worked out, great and if it didn’t, they parted ways and only then, did they begin to look for someone new. They did this until they met “the one”.

Isn’t that an interesting concept???

Dating someone and NOT thinking about looking for someone else at the same time?!? Seems that they were all really on to something. (Insert eye-roll emoji here).

One friend explained that she feels that people spend so much time looking for and expecting the next best thing, that they ignore what might be perfect, right in front of their faces.

Side note: It is absolutely possible that you might get lucky and actually find your quintessential person by “serial dating” and “multi-dating”. There is a whole group of people out there who swear by doing it this way. However, statistics show that more times than not, that doesn’t happen and people end up looking back and realizing that they are alone because they passed on some incredible people while looking for something potentially “better”. This is the point where they usually end up settling for someone mediocre because they don’t want to end up alone.

This leads me to the ever so popular decision of DTR. Ah yes, DTR, made popular by the awesome MTV show AWKWARD. I’m totally going to name drop right now. I once hung out with Molly Tarlov aka Sadie Saxton from AWKWARD outside a bar in LA. I’ll post a pic #humblebrag #yourewelcome #thiswontmakesenseifyouhaventseenawkward. Anyway, I digressed. When is it appropriate to DTR? How soon is too soon? Fuck if I know. Not too long ago, I messed up a seemingly good potential “thing” while overly obsessing about this very topic. When did it become this confusing and is it just today’s society making it so confusing? Do we just go for it like our parents and friends from before all the dating apps did? I want to know what you guys think. Message me and let me know your thoughts.

Thanks for stopping by.

Xoxo- Melissa

2 thoughts on “DTR

  1. Just stumbled across your blog thanks to RealitySteve, and caught this post. It struck me because I was having the same conversation a few days ago with a friend about how much the internet has ruined dating (it seems) because of all the options that appear to be available. So why should someone settle down or settle for just one option when they could just swipe and swipe and swipe for someone that might be seen as better?

    I’m such an old school type of person that the thought of internet dating boggles my mind anyway, but I can see the problems that can be created by having so many apparent options.

    All of that is basically to say that you’re spot on with all of this.

    Like

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